Kink and fetish

 Kink and fetish: what's the difference? 

Sex is a very personal matter, and it is difficult to label it. If you encounter things that are not traditional sexual behaviors and behaviors, you may use words such as "kink" and "fetish" to describe them.

But what is the difference between kink and fetishism? People tend to use these terms interchangeably, but experts say they are actually different. Here is what you need to know about kinks and fetishes-and why they are different.

What is a kink?

Dr. Janet Brito, a clinical psychologist and AASECT-certified sex therapist in Honolulu, told Health that kink is "a general term that describes non-traditional sexual behavior and practice." Kink may be an unconventional sexual desire, or pleasure from something that is considered to be outside the normal range. Brito said that kinks usually include "anything that is non-traditional and intimate desire, practice, or fantasy."

Kink is a "social term with vague and different meanings," New Mexico clinical psychologist, Dr. David Ley who specializes in sexual problems, and the author of Dicks Ethical Porn told Health. This is a fluid word that can be used for a series of sex-related things that are slightly different from the usual.

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What is fetish?

Fetishes are more targeted. "Historically, fetishism is a sexual disorder. In this case, individuals have a specific, limited stimulus that they need for sexual arousal," Ley said. In other words, someone may have a foot fetish or a foot fetish because they need these things to be awakened. For example, a person who has sex in public may only be opened when they have sex in public or in other specific situations.

"Fetishism usually requires that the behavior or object must be present in order to be sexually aroused," Delaware sex therapist Debra Laino told Health Wilmington. Ley said that sexual health experts often refer to this as a "porn target error," which means that a person's sexual interests are focused on things other than what people think is normal.

What is the difference between kink and fetish?

You might call kinks "fetishes" and vice versa, but they are not the same. "Fetishes tend to be more of a fixed arousal template, and often very specific," Brito said. "Kinking is usually an experience used to enhance sexual contact." Laino said that kinking does not need to be as specific as a fetish. "With kinks, sexual arousal does not depend on the behavior or the object," she said.

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Can you have kinks and fetishes?

Yes. "Someone may hear people have sex, they may have foot fetish at the same time, and have to suck their toes to get out of the car," Leno said.

Brito said that people "often" have more than one fetish or fetish, and there is often overlap. She said that, for example, role-playing might involve a partner dressed as a college student, which might indicate a fascination with uniforms, while another dressed as a professor, which is an age game entanglement.

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Is it okay to have kinks or fetishes?

Ley said that if you have certain sexual interests that most people would think are a bit different, but it won't hurt you or anyone else, it's really not a problem. "The most effective way is to focus on how a person pursues their sexuality, not what they are," he said. "The principle of sexual health focuses on all aspects of healthy sexual values, rather than judging the behavior itself. Does it focus on honesty, safety, consent, mutual, shared values, and non-exploitation? If so, then this type of sexual behavior is healthy, even if Rare or'extreme'," he said.

But if your kink or fetish is involuntary, or it causes you emotional distress or problems in different areas of your life, your kink or fetish is a problem, Brito said.

In general, experts say that it is important to understand your sexual interests and how they affect the lives of you and others. "A lot of people have addictions and fetishes, which is normal," Leno said. "When they break the law or put you or other people in danger of harm, or when they disagree, it may be time to ask for help. There are multiple levels of sex, and people’s erotic desires are very diverse, so learn Embracing one's own unique threshold of erotic behavior is important for sexual health."